At Banana Split, we’re all about celebrating our bodies — and busting the myths that have left so many of us confused, insecure, or misinformed. As a sapphic person, you may think you're a vagina aficionado--and you probably are--but the lack of adequete education about female anatomy in our society can leave even us with some pretty severe blind spots.
In honor of Vagina Appreciation Day, we’re debunking 10 of the most common (and frankly, ridiculous) myths about vaginas and vulvas.
Because loving your body starts with knowing it.
Myth 1: The clitoris is just a little pea-shaped nub.
Truth:
That tiny nub you can see? It’s just the visible tip of a much larger structure.
Internally, the clitoris stretches about 3.5 to 5 inches, forming a wishbone shape that hugs the vaginal canal. It’s made up of the glans, body, crura (legs), and vestibular bulbs — all filled with nerve endings. Its internal structures are why certain types of penetration feel pleasurable, because they indirectly stimulate the clitoris even when you aren’t touching the visible part.
Fun fact: The clitoris has around 8,000 nerve endings, which is double the number found in the penis!
Myth 2: The vagina and vulva are the same thing.
Truth:
Nope — they’re two very different parts!
The vagina is the internal muscular canal leading from the vaginal opening to the cervix. The vulva is everything you can see on the outside: the labia majora and minora, clitoris, urethral opening, and vaginal opening.
Most people mistakenly call the whole area the “vagina,” but naming your anatomy accurately matters — especially when it comes to advocating for your health!
Myth 3: Vaginas get “loose” or “tight” permanently based on sex.
Truth:
The vagina is designed to stretch — and bounce back.
It’s made of muscular tissue that can expand for sex, tampons, or childbirth, and then return to its typical state afterward.
Temporary changes in vaginal tightness can happen with age, hormonal shifts, pelvic floor strength, or health conditions — not based on sexual history.
This myth has deep roots in purity culture and misogyny, aiming to shame women for being sexually active. In reality, the vagina’s elasticity is a sign of its strength, not a judgment on your choices.
Myth 4: Penetration is the main way people with vaginas achieve orgasm.
Truth:
Studies consistently show that around 75% of people with vaginas require direct clitoral stimulation to orgasm — not penetration alone.
The clitoris is the main pleasure center, and most of its sensitive tissue is not inside the vaginal canal.
Fun fact: There are even more pleasure zones than the clitoris alone, like the G-spot and the lesser-known A-spot (anterior fornix erogenous zone) deeper in the vagina — but they still often involve clitoral connections to maximize pleasure.
Myth 5: Lubrication always means arousal, and dryness means you aren’t turned on.
Truth:
Physical arousal and lubrication don’t always match up — and that’s completely normal.
This is called genital non-concordance, meaning what your genitals are doing doesn’t always match what your brain and emotions are feeling.
Lubrication can be influenced by hormones, hydration, stress, medications, menopause, and many other factors.
Pro tip: When using sex toys internally, remember to frequently apply lube to the toy itself. Silicone toys can dry up fast, which can make them feel uncomfortable. You can't go too far when it comes to using lube--more almost always equals better.
Myth 6: It’s normal for people with vaginas to experience pain during penetration.
Truth:
Pain is your body’s way of saying something needs attention — not something to ignore.
There are a few common reasons you may experience pain. You may not be physically ready for penetration at the moment and need some more time getting warmed up. You may be too dry down there and adding some lube is an easy fix.
However, persistent pain can be a sign of vaginismus (involuntary tightening of vaginal muscles), infections, pelvic floor dysfunction, endometriosis, or hormonal issues. Good news? Many of these conditions are highly treatable with the right care.
Pleasure should never come at the cost of pain. Trust your body and take it's reactions seriously. Sex should be enjoyed not endured.
Myth 7: Vaginas need to be cleaned internally.
Truth:
Nope! Your vagina actual cleans itself!
It maintains a healthy environment through natural secretions that flush out bacteria and dead cells. Using soaps, douches, or internal cleaning products can disrupt your vaginal pH and microbiome, leading to infections like bacterial vaginosis or yeast infections. External cleansing of the vulva with warm water is all you need — no fancy products required.
Myth 8: Vaginal discharge isn’t normal.
Truth:
Discharge is a natural, healthy function that helps keep your vagina clean, lubricated, and infection-free.
Normal discharge can change throughout your cycle — becoming clear and stretchy around ovulation, creamy afterward, and slightly thicker before your period.
Signs to watch for (and talk to a provider about) include a strong odor, green or gray color, or significant itching — but everyday discharge is a sign your body is doing exactly what it’s supposed to.
Fun fact: Squalene, the cleansing/lubricating liquid found in our vagina is also found in the livers of shark!
Myth 9: If you’re not having penis-in-vagina sex, you don’t need to go to the gynecologist.
Truth:
All people with vaginas need gynecological care — no matter their sexual activity or orientation.
Gynecological issues don’t discriminate based on who you’re sleeping with (or not sleeping with!). Cervical screenings (Pap smears), pelvic exams, STI testing, and discussions about pelvic pain, hormonal health, and infections are all vital parts of body care.
Taking charge of your health is always important, and preventative care is key.
Myth 10: You need an excuse to buy yourself a new sex toy.
Truth:
You absolutely don’t need an excuse — pleasure is self-care, not a luxury you have to “deserve.” So if you're looking for a sign to treat yourself and prioritize your pleasure today, this is it!